whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
