i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
