Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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