I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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