Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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