Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
