Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Randomize
