I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
