yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
