last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
