i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
