Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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