So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize