There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
