so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
