the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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