I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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