Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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