he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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