he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
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