So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize