Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
dude i'm inner monologue high
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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