I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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