Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
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