so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
