I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize
