What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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