I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
