how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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