I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
