who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
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It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
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Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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