rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
No I am not eating basil off your cock
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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