i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
