i just google imaged poop.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
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