I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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