I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
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I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They took my balls.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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