1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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