A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize