Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
