Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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