sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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