I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
