Small penises have feelings too.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
