The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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