Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
