That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
