He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
