my sisters under your porch take her home
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize
