i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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