So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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