Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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