I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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